an exorcism

I'm really getting tired of hanging out with these people. Fifty years I've been tolerating this bullshit— never having enough, driving a broke down car, paying for gas in pennies. White woman tears manipulating behavior and it keeps working, every time. Someone feels bad for them having to go it alone, not having enough, being mistreated. The whole world seems programmed to protect them and help them out, uphold their honor.

Same as it listens to white men and accords them some kind of intelligence and authority. Oblivious to the obvious. They've been telling everyone what and who they are since jump, done nothing but show how they lie and manipulate. Honor isn't even present here. Do they know what honor is? Every word out of his mouth is a lie. Just because he believes it doesn't make it true. Rampant moral decline doesn't adequately express what's happening here, I think we're past rock bottom. How many files and photos have to be revealed before folks start reconsidering their beliefs? When these so-called leaders demand removal of the rapists and murderers, it's the horrors in their own consciousness they're trying to purge. Venezuelan men with tattoos are not the problem. It's not immigrants or Black and Brown people, it's not trans people or any of us who've ever struggled through life at the margins. The villains are front and center: the king of the circus and all who feed and support him are the poisons here. 

Helicopters just landing wherever, cities becoming a militarized hellscape, country homes suddenly bursting into flames, school shootings unabated, vigilanteism on the rise— people's fears and biases have been fueled with unwholesome rhetoric for years. Everyone's insecurities poked with sticks, prodded into hate-fueled self-righteousness. Swastikas being sold in the marketplace now, branded it as "hiphop necklaces." Still don't see what's happening here? Even I am getting flooded with job listings to become an ICE agent. Uncle Sam pointing directly at me. 

Maybe it was my childhood imagination, but I think there used to be a baseline level of ethics and care in the collective. Honor was real. Some people had religion, others lived by a golden rule. Wherever it came from, there was some kind of morality, ethics in the air. I've tested all kinds of guidelines myself, following different creeds and practices hoping to find a good way to live. In doing so, I met Hiri and Ottappa, the protectors of the world. People are going to do whatever they want I guess, but I'm an advocate for ethical guidelines, for care. I live with vows, trainings that I've practiced consistently for years that bring order to my own life and offer protection to those around me. 

• I undertake the training to refrain from killing living beings, I endeavor to meet all beings on common ground. 
• I undertake the training to refrain from stealing, taking that which is not freely given and practicing generosity. 
• I undertake the training to refrain from misuse of sexuality and the senses, cultivating respect in all my relationships. 
• I undertake the training to refrain from speech that is harsh, divisive, false or meaningless and to cultivate wise speech.
• I undertake the training to refrain from misuse of intoxicants which causes carelessness and clouds the mind. I commit to caring for this body-mind. 

The guidelines I live by are a based on the precepts shared with me by my teachers Thanissara & Kittisaro from the Thai Forest tradition of Ajahn Chah, also influenced by the precepts from Manzanita Village (pdf available here).

I'm not telling anybody else how to live, I'm just saying what I do. For myself, I like having some guardrails, some guidelines that help me navigate the world in ways that don't add to the suffering in the world. These are battle-tested guidelines, followed for thousands of years by those who sought liberation for themselves and others. If these vows worked out for the Enlightened Ones, I figured I might as well try it for myself and see how it works for me. There is no harm. It's not like they're rules or commandments, more like suggestions— see for yourself how it is for you. Does your life change when considering the impacts of your behavior on those around you? What are the changes? How do things shift? Take what you like, leave the rest.

I myself may not be able to keep rapists from raping, murderers from murdering directly. Of course I'll stop it if I can, but some people are operating outside of a moral, ethical universe, unreflective. Giving everyone the benefit of the doubt, perhaps they know not what they do, operating completely unconsciously. The story of Angulimala suggests that even the worst of the worst among us are capable of change and growth. Thich Nhat Hanh tells the story of Angulimala here (part 2 here). I wouldn't want to write anyone off. I believe everyone can get free. Let's free ourselves first and see if our joy and kindness, compassion, our frequency doesn't begin to shift the frequency of those around us. That's how frequency works, what I've seen reflected in my own experience. When I can anchor in my field, ground in my own frequency and radiate energy outward, the entire field shifts all around me. May it be so for all people of goodwill.

I woke this morning remembering how Michael, maybe that wasn't his name then, maybe he went by something else— Shadow or something, he was in a Goth phase at the time— showed us how to shift the field with energy. It's happening again here now. Time to chase the devil out of earth. In addition to the noise demos, now there are Voodoo dolls and piles of ash appearing where ICE agents try to stay. No different from how we smudged the whole area the last time we came up against repressive forces: some burned Palo Santo, some meditated, others sang, chanted and danced. We tried to drive the demons out with our drums, our passions, our joy. No more war. No more oppression. That time is over. This is an exorcism, everyone's invited. Bring all your tools and practices, everything is needed.