you energy
I keep asking if anyone else can feel that and no one seems to. Every morning now I feel the vibrating, a pull in the body, radiating, rumbling. It's not me. It's not just this body breathing, vibrating. It's not the building shaking. It's not garbage trucks or delivery trucks, school busses or helicopters, this is something different. My cat might know what I'm talking about, but my telepathy is weak. I used to be fluent– if fluency is the measurement– when I was a kid, but I couldn't find anyone else to communicate with, no people anyway. I stopped and talked with my mouth more like everyone else here. I feel the earth pulsing, breathing, tossing and turning. She hasn't been sleeping well either, restless, tired of our shit and I suspect we're all going to feel it soon enough, not just me.
My geo- and astrophysicist friends, the ones who are open, who sip tea, sing, pray and wear sacred geometry t-shirts know what I'm talking about. No one wants to fear-monger, but the information is widely available and has been since forever. Those of us who watch and read the stars understand the cold moon is coming and will bring more illumination than maybe folks were ready for. We see and feel the space weather, either in our own bodies and intuition or through the charts and graphs, keeping an eye on what NOAA tells us. We've been losing power lately, off and on. Not sure if people see the larger patterns or just get frustrated and angry in moments of personal inconvenience and forget about what's happening beyond the boundaries of their own lives, their own awareness immediately.
I dreamed swimming, as I do. Someone left their jewels neatly laid out on the side of the pool. Someone else was removing lots of boxes and packaging to the trash out in the alley. I was disappointed that one of my favorite teachers at the gym was out again, replaced by the screechy sub who wore lots of perfume and full makeup. Not here for that, I just swim off slowly, quietly into the deep, ignoring whatever's going on in the shallow end.
I need to get this body back into water. I skipped it yesterday, no gym for me— not for lack of discipline, but love of whatever this is. I flow where the energy takes me and it wasn't taking me to the gym in a freezing rain, it was staying warm in blankets with hot cups of tea throughout the day, cat on my lap. The sensitive among us have been staying hoodies up, bedecked in scarves, blankets and soft things, clutching our hematite and jet, grounding in every way we can. I will walk on the earth today. Barefoot on the earth if I can manage it— feels like 27º out right now, that's fine. I'm going to try to find some earth to walk on. Not cement or asphalt, earth.
Haters are going to mock me, I know, they're my relatives. I've been mocked and teased, discounted, ignored my entire life. It doesn't stop being painful, but I no longer try too hard to convince them of my perspective. Let them be right if they want to be right. Let them feel smarter, more savvy, more of whatever it is they want to feel. It's fine. When I walk on the earth I know that this body is an earth body, I know the energy and magnetism radiating within and through us all, plasma flowing within and all around. My choices, even the smallest ones, matter. Every one of us and our lives matter more than we can fathom— we are incredibly significant and inconsequential at once. Not for sentimental reasons, not "you matter" like that, but each as an essential component of a coherent being. This might be one of those weird times in history when the artists and poets are speaking the same language as the scientists. (I saw a t-shirt once that said you matter until you multiply yourself by the speed of light squared, then you energy.) May it be so. I don't have to wish it any longer because it's already happening. It is done.
Learn more with Stefan Burns: